I read Second Nephi Chapter 4 today. It always gets to me. I love this chapter in The Book of Mormon because it is Nephi pouring out his soul - and every time I read it, I feel like he is voicing exactly how I feel. What a beautiful scripture. This is verses 17-34, with a little bit of editing on my part to make it display my thoughts today:
"Notwithstanding the great goodness
of the Lord, in showing me his great and marvelous works, my heart exclaimeth:
O wretched man that I am! Yea, my heart sorroweth because of my flesh; my soul
grieveth because of mine iniquities.
"I am encompassed about, because of
the temptations and the sins which do so easily beset me.
"And when I desire to rejoice, my
heart groaneth because of my sins; nevertheless, I know in whom I have trusted.
"My God hath been my support; he
hath led me through mine afflictions in the wilderness; and he hath preserved
me upon the waters of the great deep.
"He hath filled me with his love, even
unto the consuming of my flesh…
"Behold, he hath heard my cry by day,
and he hath given me knowledge…
"O then, if I have seen so great
things, if the Lord in his condescension unto the children of men hath visited
men in so much mercy, why should my heart weep and my soul linger in the valley
of sorrow, and my flesh waste away, and my strength slacken, because of mine
afflictions?
"And why should I yield to sin,
because of my flesh? Yea, why should I give way to temptations, that the evil
one have place in my heart to destroy my peace and afflict my soul? Why am I angry
because of mine enemy?
"Awake, my soul! No longer droop in
sin. Rejoice, O my heart, and give place no more for the enemy of my soul.
"Do not anger again because of mine
enemies. Do not slacken my strength because of mine afflictions.
"Rejoice, O my heart, and cry unto the
Lord, and say: O Lord, I will praise thee forever; yea, my soul will rejoice in
thee, my God, and the rock of my salvation.
"O Lord, wilt thou redeem my soul?
Wilt thou deliver me out of the hands of mine enemies? Wilt thou make me that I
may shake at the appearance of sin?
"May the gates of hell be shut
continually before me, because that my heart is broken and my spirit is
contrite! O Lord, wilt thou not shut the gates of thy righteousness before me,
that I may walk in the path of the low valley, that I may be strict in the
plain road!
"O Lord, wilt thou encircle me
around in the robe of thy righteousness! O Lord, wilt thou make a way for mine
escape before mine enemies! Wilt thou make my path straight before me! …
"O Lord, I have trusted in thee, and I
will trust in thee forever... Yea, I know that God will give aliberally to him
that asketh. Yea, my God will give me, if I bask cnot amiss; therefore I will
lift up my voice unto thee; yea, I will cry unto thee, my God, the rock of my righteousness.
Behold, my voice shall forever ascend up unto thee, my rock and mine
everlasting God. Amen."
This is also one of my favorite chapters!
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