Friday, August 15, 2014

My Path to Motherhood: Jonah


    *** We went to breakfast while we were in California, just as our little family. 


     The first thing the waiter said when he saw us was, "Wow, you guys haven't wasted any time!" Then, pointing to each kid, "Bam, bam, bam!"

     Because of comments from some people and stares from others, I thought it would be fun to take the time to share the story of how we decided to have each of our kids, starting with our first little blessing, Ellie. In sharing each of these stories, I hope to share my belief that when to have children and how many to have is a personal decision between a husband, wife, and the Lord. I have a very real testimony that the Lord does have a unique plan for each of His children, and often the Lord's plan for us is not what we may have imagined. And, most likely, His plan for you is not the same as His plan for me. And that's ok. ***

YOU CAN READ PART 1 HERE, PART 2 HERE, PART 4 HERE.

     I wanted to start out this final post by saying that I hope that I haven't portrayed in any way that everyone needs to have children soon after getting married, that they need to have them close together, or that there is any one "right" way to get them here.

     I also wanted to acknowledge that I know that getting pregnant and having children can be a painful or sensitive topic for people who want more than anything to be parents and haven't yet had the opportunity, or have lost a child or children to pregnancy complications. I want you to know that I have not been oblivious to your feelings as I have posted these stories; rather I have been very aware of how sharing these details may affect you. I hope that those of my friends in these situations know that I think about you each often, and that I love you.

     As I mentioned in Nathan's story, he was born via emergency c-section. At my 6-week postpartum visit after Nathan, I asked about future pregnancies and the possibility of a VBAC (vaginal birth after cesarean). My doctor was very positive and reassured me that I was a great candidate for a VBAC with future deliveries. He also said that it would take 18 months for the scar on my uterus to completely heal, so if I wanted to be at the lowest risk for uterine rupture, he would suggest that my next baby be born after that 18-month mark (since I saw the effects of a uterine rupture while I was doing my Mother/Baby clinical rotations, the thought terrified me).

     Because of my doctor's suggestion, I thought we would wait awhile to have another baby. Besides, if I'm being completely honest, recovering from a c-section and getting used to having two kids was giving me a run for my money!

     I took a semester off of school from January-April, and during that time I took the NCLEX - and passed! I had fulfilled my long-time goal of becoming a Registered Nurse. In April I went back to school to get my Bachelors of Science in Nursing.

     In May I had that familiar feeling again - we needed to bring another baby to our family. Sam and I were a little hesitant because of the doctor's advice, but we acted on faith, and were very excited when we found out I was pregnant again in July - baby due at the beginning of April.

     Around the same time we learned I was pregnant, a friend of mine told me that the home health agency she worked for was hiring nurses for pediatric patients. I enjoyed learning about and taking care of peds in the hospital, and the hours were unbeatable (2 8-hour days a week), so I took the job.

     I went to school and worked two days a week, which meant I was away from my kids more than I wanted to be, but I learned a ton between the two.

     After a few months I started to dread going to work each time - not because the job was unpleasant, I actually quite liked it - but because I hated spending more time than necessary away from my kids. The job I was working was not necessary for us financially, it wasn't giving me any significant nursing experience, and my kids just needed their mom home as much as possible. Sam and I talked about these thoughts for a month until finally one day in December as I was dropping Sam off on my way to work, I broke down. (Coming home to find the babysitter asleep on the couch with Ellie glued to PBS and Nathan playing on the floor in a dirty diaper  a few days earlier may or may not have sent me over the edge...) His response was, "You need to give your two weeks. Today." I was surprised. I didn't want to be a quitter. I didn't give my notice that day, but after Sam and I prayerfully discussed it some more, we decided that it was better for me to be home with the kids when I wasn't at school, rather than working. So a few days later I gave my two week's notice, and I haven't regretted that choice even once since.

     My final semester of school started in January of 2014. For the clinical hours in one of my classes, I was blessed to work with the very instructor that gave me pointers on applying to the Nursing program after Ellie was born. She pushed me to work hard, but she was also very understanding of my situation. It turns out that she, too, went through nursing school at BYU-Idaho with kids. I enjoyed working with her and listening to her experiences as a nurse, a mother and a grandmother as my due date got closer.

     On March 30 my little VBAC baby, Jonah, was born. Needless to say, I missed my final clinical rotation the next day. :)


     Jonah is such a calm, content little boy - he only really gets upset when he's tired or hungry. He loves when his siblings interact with him, even if it is a little rougher than I would prefer. I echo the testimony I shared on the Lord's perfect timing of the births my other two kids: He knows what He's doing, and I am so grateful He sent Jonah to our family when He did.








     Our life is crazy with three tiny kids. The house is almost never clean or quiet. It involves almost as much planning to get kids out the door and keep them occupied at the grocery store as it takes to plan meals. I haven't heard more than a 2-minute snippet of a church lesson in over a year. My clean clothes don't stay clean for long, and neither do the kids'. My days consist of wiping bums and noses. We sing the same songs, read the same books, and have the same conversations over and over and over again. I mitigate fights, kiss "owies," and enforce rules. As a lady said to me when she learned the ages of my kids, "Wow, you sure are becoming immersed in motherhood quickly, aren't you?!" I am. And like I said to her, "I wouldn't have it any other way."




2 comments:

  1. Your family is so beautiful. I also want to add that I have only ever felt compassion and love from you with regards to Thomas. Thank you for sharing these stories they were fun to read!

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  2. I finally got a chance to read up on your blog. Heidi, you amaze me. You are truly a beautiful human and your spirituality and insight and goodness are inspiring. Thanks for sharing all of your stories. Finally, your kids are adorable. I can not get over Ellie. She looks JUST like your Mom to me. She's darling.

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